SHE'LL BE WITH US FOR A LONG TIME

Emigrant literature evokes deep and poignant feelings in readers, such as longing for the homeland, family, and home. These are concepts that almost everyone can relate to. Emigrant literature has a special mood. No matter what the characters go through, there is a common thread of either endless nostalgia or hope of return in all their events, thoughts, and emotions.

Our fellow citizen Mehriban EFENDI is the author of the bestseller I sat alone by the gate, a novel about emigration. Mehriban herself has experienced emigration twice in the recent past: first from Azerbaijan to the United States and then back. Now the Azerbaijani writer, who has spent two decades in the States and published a book, is back in her homeland and shares with us what led to the creation of her bestseller. The book was printed by Greenleaf Book Group Press (USA) and TEAS Press (Azerbaijan). It has been translated into Turkish and will soon hit the Turkish book-stores. The novel is currently being translated into Azerbaijani, and there are plans to translate it into Russian in the future. In the States, the book is sold in Barnes and Noble stores. Its electronic version is available on Amazon.

"Judging by the latest milestones of your life, you have radically changed your place and country of residence. You had to adapt to life and culture in the US for the first time, and two decades later you did it again, but this time in Azerbaijan. How is the process going? Is it over? Don't you miss the American spaces and opportunities?"

"Yes, changing a country after living there for 20 years is a special kind of extreme sport. I wouldn't have done it on my own. I returned to my homeland thanks to my husband's long-held dream. He, like me, lived in the US for almost 20 years, but he always hoped that one day he would return to his homeland. It sounds very romantic, even patriotic. If I read that in an interview, I would probably be skeptical, but I have no other explanation.

"Adapting to a new country is always hard. I realised this when I wrote a book about this stage of my life. You are both excited about new opportunities, new streets and names, a new role in life, and at the same time you feel utterly alone. You feel sad and it seems that no one in the world cares about you.

"I am surprised to notice that adaptation doesn't get easier with age. It was just as hard for me to get used to life in Baku. And to answer your question - the process is not over, but it is easier for me than it was a year ago.

"I miss America. I miss the city I used to live in, the clear schedule and planned life I was so accustomed to in the States. In Texas, people live in big houses. So I miss my home, the living room I decorated myself, the quiet hours spent with a book on the couch. I miss the park where I used to run in the mornings, the old cafe where musicians, artists and poets used to hang out all the time. I miss the terrible heat of Houston. Moving to Baku helped me realise how much of a "creature of habit" I am and how much I get attached to people, things, and weather. Many people think I am constantly travelling, but as one of my friends said, "you need wings to fly and a house to come back to endlessly."

"You are the author of I Sat Alone By the Gate, a bestselling book about emigration. The theme is not new, but it is still captivating. Did your work have a happy fate?" 

"What a great question! No, I wouldn't call it happy. The book is not easy, but neither is emigration. The main character in my novel is Maryam, an 18 year old girl who just graduated from high school and moved from Baku to Chicago with her mom and brother.

"Things go wrong for Maryam and her family as soon as they arrive. Her mom has to divorce her husband, money runs out fast and Maryam has to work to support her family. My character, who grew up in the familiar and warm environment we all know, is suddenly thrust into adulthood. Her childhood, which feels like it just ended a week ago, is over. And so she leaves the apartment they have moved into and takes trains and buses to her first job. This is her first big challenge in life. Her path is not easy, but Maryam, fragile and inexperienced, proves to be quite resilient."

"As you were working on the book, did you think about who you were writing it for, who your audience was?"

"The team at the publishing house defined the audience very carefully and it includes several categories - immigrant women between 30 and 60 years old, who like to read about women's stories, who enjoy books and movies based on real events. They are interested in the topic of immigration itself and how different cultures cope with it. They are mostly working married women with children, and books are a way for them to escape into another world, to take a break from the daily hustle.

"When I went on a book tour, which included 6 cities and 9 events, I was surprised to find out that I had a large audience in the US represented by the Azerbaijani diaspora. Friends and readers in all cities came to my presentations and supported me by buying my book and sharing their impressions with Americans. Lately, I have been getting an increasing number of messages from male readers, and it is so nice that they are also reading my novel."

"There are two categories of writers... By the way, do you consider yourself a writer or a writing person? There are those who can write but have nothing to say, and there are those who are bursting with thoughts and feelings but write poorly. Let's not forget the lucky ones who can do both. Do you think that the first two categories of writers should not doubt themselves, but should engage in creative work, develop their skills, and try their hand at writing?"

"You can write for many different reasons. You can (and should!) write to make sense of how you feel, how you see the world and how you organize it. Writing can be used to free ourselves from the things that weigh us down. Writing can also be used to understand, live and forget some life journey. It's all a path of healing through words, and I recommend it to everyone. Think back to the last time you sat down and wrote something. Right after, there is a peace inside, even if brief... Relief, emptiness. There is space in us and thanks to this we are filled, but this time not with daily vanity, but with something light, airy, magical. It's worth writing for the sake of this moment alone.

"Now let's talk about being a professional writer. In this case, there is Stephen King's advice, which I often remember: "Only write if you simply can't not write." Making money as a writer is very hard. It's a job full of emotional torment (and I'm no exception here, by the way), so it's worth subjecting yourself to only those crazy people who just can't do it otherwise. Sorry for such a long answer, but I promised to be honest.

"This afternoon I had lunch with a colleague who studied engineering in Italy but now works in media. He confessed that he dreams of writing a book about his life, but the plot seems too simple for him. "I haven't lived enough yet," he said. Then I asked him the question, "Have you experienced friendship? Love? Disappointment? Hope? If so, you just need a room with a door, a cup of tea or coffee and determination. That's all it takes to become a writer." "Can I come to you for advice?" he asked. "Of course," I replied. I do my best to help aspiring writers in this difficult endeavour." 

"So, if your book hadn't taken off the way it did, would you have kept writing?"

"Absolutely. I realised this six years ago when I finished the first chapter. I spent years searching for a sense of peace - through yoga, meditation, travelling - but I found it in the simple act of writing. Sitting down and telling a story, exploring emotions, peeling back the layers like an onion, as you say. Even the simplest story can hold incredible depth, and that's what I strive for every time I sit down at my desk, even if I didn't achieve it perfectly in my novel.

"Popularity and success are interesting questions. Of course, bestseller status and commercial success are amazing, but there's nothing quite like hearing from readers and meeting them in person. It's a spiritual fulfilment you rarely experience as a writer. We constantly pour ourselves out, which can lead to burnout and even mental health issues. Look at biographies of famous authors – you'll see everything from bipolar disorder to suicide. That's why staying grounded is so crucial for artists. So, writing isn't just a choice, it's a necessity. Love it or hate it, I'll be writing for a long time."

"Beyond writing, what keeps you busy?"

"Besides the usual chaos of kids, husband, and the occasional headache, I recently started working in corporate strategy at an oil company. It might seem like an odd fit next to my creative side, but I actually love analytical work. It fuels my creative fire, whether it's writing or painting (acrylics, by the way!). I also read constantly, much to everyone's amusement. Cafes are my husband and I's favorite spots to discuss everything under the sun, from deep thoughts to silly jokes. He's my rock – someone completely outside the world of arts, which is a blessing. It helps keep me balanced, unlike the characters in 'Vicky Cristina Barcelona'. All that passion and no grounding? Recipe for disaster! In fact, without him, my book might still be an unfinished file. He's a huge part of making my dreams come true."

"So, how do you plan to juggle your corporate job and writing career back home?"

"I plan to keep doing both. While I don't intend to become a full-time writer just yet, I'm not ruling it out for the future. My stories are about ordinary people – secretaries, drivers, students. If I disconnect from that real-life experience, I'll lose my source material. My inspiration comes from everyday scenes: public transport, office life, traffic jams, rainy evenings on the boulevard. My characters are people who struggle to balance work, family, and life's little moments – and that's where I find myself too. It's part of who I am."

"I bet you have some exciting ideas brewing for your next projects. Can you share any hints, even if it's just a language or a theme?"

"That's a secret for now, but I can assure you, it will explore the human experience in a way that's both relatable and thought-provoking.

"I don't exactly know what stories are waiting for me, but I believe it's not the writer who chooses the subject, but the subject that chooses the writer. A truly impactful story needs a deep connection, sparked by personal experiences or someone else's story that resonates with your soul.

"Like many, I grew up listening to my grandmother's captivating stories. They were filled with adventures: a spy husband, life in Bombay, the hardships after the revolution in Tabriz, the hidden documents sewn into her bag, and the hunger years of war. As a child, they seemed like fantastical tales. Only recently, I realized the immense complexity and excitement of her life.

"Those stories have stayed with me, forming a potential novel in my head. I've always loved historical fiction, and turning this into a novel feels like a worthy goal. We'll see if I can do it!"