THE PREGNANCY SYNDROME

From the first months of her pregnancy a woman begins to feel different. Joyous thoughts give way to alarm and a period of time approaches, sometimes brief and sometimes long, when she has to face the frightening truth that she is no longer one person, and this awful feeling comes from deep inside her body which she knows so well but has now become somewhat unfamiliar. A process begins where the woman tries to get used to the idea that her body belongs to someone else, some being as yet unknown. And this feeling of adjustment should emerge at a spiritual level when she finds realization and awareness of her adulthood and the psychological acceptance that the tiny person growing from a small blob of flesh will turn into the dearest and closest person in the world who could be a son or a daughter. She now faces long months of growing accustomed to the fact that she is expecting a child and learning to love her new/old body, which has suddenly become so unfamiliar.

Being in tune with oneself

Pregnancy usually lasts nine months, some times longer. Time flies, and for many women birth seems to come unexpectedly, despite the fact that the mother-to-be has been thinking about it all these past few months. What does it feel like to be pregnant? What psychological problems might a woman experience? Are her difficulties purely psychological or is it easy enough being an expectant mother in Azerbaijan? Ellada Gorina, a psychotherapist and perinatologist, a consultant psychologist on problems of personal, family and perinatal psychotherapy and head of a fitness club for future mothers, childless couples and children, answered these questions in an interview with a R+ correspondent.. 

The expert is convinced that the state of pregnancy entails not just a range of problems, but a number of transformations and discoveries. "Yes, of course, pregnant women experience peculiar mental anxieties which give the period of carrying a child so much diversity and single it out from other situations in life. But in no way should one see pregnancy purely as a time of psychological problems. After all, this is one of life's most colourful and unusual experiences. On the one hand, women become more vulnerable, susceptible, lachrymose, fretful, touchy, and on the other more sensitive, their creative side is aroused or is more fully realized and pregnant women learn to be more tolerant and withstand discomfort more easily. In other words, we believe that many amazing transformations are established during pregnancy."

As far as Azerbaijani women are concerned, here the expert is confident that they do not experience any exceptional difficulties, although she defines one particular characteristic, which is linked with two mutually sequential factors. Many women marry unprepared for family life and especially unprepared for sudden pregnancy. A certain amount of puerility leads to a situation where the period of pregnancy is not fully experienced, not in a "whole-hearted" way, and the child to some extent becomes a burden. The woman experiences contradictory feelings - on the one hand her psychophysiology reacts to pregnancy and the future child as an object of special importance, an object of love, but on the other she experiences alarm and uncertainty about her own future. The absence of a complete recognition of herself as an evolved person leads to a situation where the woman does not know how to properly divide her attention between the members of her family and she becomes excessively dependent on the opinion of older relatives. This is expressed either in submission or latent rebellion against their influence which at times spills over to counter-productive conflict situations.

"If other people are to treat a pregnant woman with understanding, first and foremost she must be at ease with herself. It is impossible and unreasonable to expect anyone else to understand and be aware of everything that is happening more deeply and more correctly than the future mother herself. When she sufficiently understands the processes and changes occurring within her, other people, family and friends begin to be imbued with the peculiarity and importance of the experiences of pregnancy," Gorina says.

Asked whether a pregnant woman should need psychological support from outside and whether she needs to go to classes in special schools, and how this question is dealt with in Azerbaijan, Gorina pointed out that the educational factor should not be underestimated. Not only pregnant women, but also husbands and others in the family should make efforts to educate themselves on matters of pregnancy, childbirth and looking after and bringing up children. "And it has to be said that not enough Azerbaijani couples do that. It brings couples together and gives them a better chance of becoming more close-knit, "switched-off" parents, and the child to have a truly happy childhood. There are all kinds of things which can be effective here, such as books, articles, the internet, and there are special courses for young parents. If a couple experience increasing difficulties and lack of understanding, and if they are unable to solve a problem themselves, then it makes sense to turn to a qualified expert - a psychologist - for help. Problems should be recognized and efforts made to resolve them rather than fighting them. Fighting is pointless," she believes.

An optional practice

According to the psychologist, there is only one thing in the life of a pregnant woman that is obligatory, and that is to recognize the miracle that is happening to her. Nothing else matters. And here an individual approach is required. "If a woman experiences no problems with pregnancy, works on her own fitness and has no problems about how to behave during her pregnancy, childhood and post-natal period and is familiar with the correct way of looking after her child from birth to the age of three, and does not feel the need of the company of other pregnant women, then she will manage perfectly well by herself. But I would like to point out that attending courses for pregnant women should not be seen as an obligatory practice only for those women who have many problems and questions linked with their current condition. Classes for pregnant women also develop and improve knowledge and understanding for those who do not have special problems. Because when it comes to personal improvement, one should proceed not just from minus to plus (from the problem to its solution), but also from plus to plus (from a good, stable situation to one even more pleasant for the baby, the mother and the whole family). A pregnant woman gets the following benefits from attending courses: meeting other mothers, i.e. creating an interests club; help in forming correct approaches to motherhood and the ability to survive unpleasant and stressful times in pregnancy and childbirth.

Psychological (lectures) and physiological (special fitness and breathing lessons) preparation for normal childbirth and studying methods of pain management are very important. Some of the main factors are understanding and the ability to breast-feed correctly and, of course, expressing one's own creative potential, broadening one's horizons, and many other things," the expert claims.

Gorina said that there are currently a number of schools for future mothers in Azerbaijan: "Unfortunately, they are all concentrated in Baku. The schools have their own style of teaching, but the main trend in each of them is to help shape a positive mood towards pregnancy, childbirth and future changes." At the same time, she did not deny that in our country there is a high demand for such schools. Besides, having such centres of education helps to reduce the level of child and maternal mortality to a minimum. As regards the problems which most pregnant women in Azerbaijan ask experts, the perinatologist said she is usually asked about things such as fear before birth, worry about the child's health, their own future and future relations with their child and lack of understanding in the family - with their husband or relatives from both sides.